Dating and Pain

Dating is not meant to be painful.  Looking at potential dates on is not meant to be painful.

Very few of us are without relationship pain by the time that we reach adulthood.  It is how we deal with this pain that eventually defines who we are in the dating world.


Are you over him or her?  That is the first question that anyone is going to ask when they read your profile.  If your profile describes your ex as much as it describes you then you are probably not ready to start dating, at least that is what most others are going to think.


Are you bitter about your last relationship?  When you were very young you probably did not define your next potential love match in terms of an angry definition of what you did NOT want in your next partner.  While some never achieve this, forgiveness is a postitive way to approach your ex.  It will free you to focus on your positive future and enable others to see you for what is positive in you, not what was negative about your ex.


Would you date yourself?  Look at your description and photos thru the eyes of others.  Are you someone that you would date?  Or do you project anger and frustration at how your love life has gone up until this moment?


ARE YOU FUN?  If you can think back to times as a child try and remember recess...  Who did the other kids want to be with?  The fun kids????  Or the angry grumpy kids?  Not much has changed.  If you want other people to be interested in getting to know you be positive.


BE YOURSELF!       Some of the best advice that can be given after you have healed from your last relationship is to just BE YOURSELF!  Whatever you find intereting and fun to do in life mention that in your profile.  What you find attractive in others, what you want to do in your future, places you would like to go, and POSITIVE things that you have done in your past.  Mention these things and you will find many more taking an interest in getting to know you.


Be postive and good luck in your adventure here!